Will I need a name tag in Heaven?

Well if I have done this life correctly, I guess I won’t.  But suppose I have withheld myself from God, hid behind the tree when I thought He was looking for me, averted my eyes when walking down the street?

How about when He said, “Excuse me, would you like to spend some time together on Sunday morning”?  Am I only answering His mail that is addressed to Current Resident?

Why is it so hard to accept that He knows me so well, that His “Kate radar” functions 24/7?  Because I’m afraid? Because I don’t want anyone to know me that well? Because if you know me that well, how could you love me?

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; ”   Jeremiah 1 1.

That’s a hard one. Before I formed you in the womb….  before!  So even knowing every single thing about me You still went ahead and formed me. My next words are:  in spite of who I am…. Yours are:  because of who you are.

Before becoming a Secular Franciscan, I thought God was ‘aware’ of me. On the mountain in the crowd of the 5000, being hungry after spending the day listening to Jesus preach, He knew I was there but maybe not exactly where.  Now I feel like Jesus would say, “Wait; Kate didn’t get any fish and bread. No, please, take it…..I saved it just for you.”

In my very human mind, I thought God wouldn’t be interested in knowing me.  He had so, so many others to look after.  People who suffer more; people who need Him more; people who love Him more;  people who deserve Him more.

I need my name tag on here on Earth because I have a hard time believing God can love me as I am…warts and all.  “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.” Again from Jeremiah 31 1.  Maybe Jeremiah had trouble with his name tag, too.

I am coming late to maturity in faith, but thankfully, I’m getting there.  I know….can feel…that God knows right where I am on that mountain.  I don’t need my name tag any more to know who I am and the best part is that I know God knows me without needing that name tag.  He always has!

copyrighted kate kleinert, ofs

Valentine’s Day!  The day celebrating love and giving a gift to your sweetie.

It’s also a good day to reflect on the gifts God has given you.  He gave them to you with love and He gave them to each and every one of us.

Some people jump in right away and say I don’t have any gifts.  I’m not good at anything.  I’m not talented.  Well, that just isn’t so.  God gave each of us many gifts and it’s an insult to Him if we aren’t using them.  You know how you feel when you have spent a great deal of time deciding on a gift, finding just the right one, wrapping it carefully and then wait joyfully for the time to give it.  If the receiver doesn’t ever use the gift, you feel cheated and a little hurt.  You put a lot of effort into it and the other person doesn’t appreciate it.  I wonder if God feels the same way?

God gave us specific gifts for a reason.  Sometimes that reason isn’t so easy to figure out and sometimes our gifts aren’t so easy to see, either.  But they are there, and it’s our job to cultivate them and offer the fruits back to God.

That is the message in Matthew, Chapter 25.  I never quite understood this story.  It’s the one about the Master given the talents to the three servants.  The first servant invested the talents and made many more.  The second servant did likewise.  But the third servant, afraid of losing the talent that belonged to the Master, buried it.

When the Master asked for it back, the servant dug it up and returned it.  Now here is where I always got confused.  The Master was angry.  But I could not figure out why.  After all, the servant didn’t spend it.  He didn’t gamble it away; he didn’t forget where he buried it.  But the reason the Master was angry is because the servant didn’t put the talent to good use.  It wasn’t helping anyone by being buried.

If you still cannot figure out what your gifts are, stop and think about what it is that you are good at.  Are you a good listener?  Clever with your hands?  Able to trouble shoot computers? A good cook?  What do people tell you, you are good at?  These things were given to you for you to use to glorify your Lord.

I’m sure there is someone sitting here thinking the only thing I am good at is eating!  Then go out to eat with someone who is alone.  Good cook?  Make a meal for the neighbor with a new baby or a family member in hospice.  Clever with your hands?  Crochet a baby blanket and drop it off at the Mother’s Home in Darby.

There is no reason to take pride in our gifts or talents.  They came from God and really are no reflection on us.  They are part of the package.  Something that was tucked in for good measure as you made your way to Earth.  But we can take care of them, nurture them and use them.

I would love to draw.  I even took a class.  But it’s just not in there.  I don’t have that gift.  Taking classes or wanting it badly doesn’t make it happen.  I do like to write and have used that to write to a number of prisoners.  Besides writing to my friend Christy for the last 35 years, I have several other prisoners on my pen pal list.  I’m not saying that with any pride because I get much more out it than I put in.

I have been told most of my life that I have a nice singing voice.  But I could not or would not get up in front of people and use that gift.  I always felt like who did I think I was,  supposing I was good enough to do that???

It took me a long, long time before I was able to see that using that gift was not a source of pride. But not using it was the same as the servant burying the talent he was given.  I have no control over being able to sing.  But God put it in my package for a reason.  He must want me to use it.

If you are still having trouble, ask for the gift of using your gift.  After all what parent doesn’t beam when a child asks them how to use what you’ve given them.  God is waiting for you to use your gifts.  And isn’t He the last one you want to disappoint.

One of our own sisters, Donna Adams, OFS, St. John Neumann Fraternity has this quote as her email tag line.  It is from writer Erma Bombeck who many of us will remember as someone who wrote with great humor about her family.  And the quote is:  When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me.
Erma Bombeck

Everyone has something to offer.  Put a smile on God’s face by using what you were gifted.

Poverty of Attitude

A few weeks ago, a friend called to tell me that a mutual friend had passed away.  Although we knew Dottie was very sick, we were not were aware that she was so close to the end of her time and had been in hospice for a while.  My friend and I felt guilty that we had not tried harder to reach Dottie or her sons.

I called the sons to offer my condolences.  The call rolled over to the answering machine.  I was not prepared to hear Dottie’s voice and even more shocking was how wonderful she sounded.  I hadn’t heard her sound like that in more than a year.

I was so startled, that I‘m not sure what I even said on the message. But I began an entire conversation in my head that I’m sure I planned to have with everyone and anyone I ran into…..oh how awful, this poor woman died and I called and here she is sounding alive and well.  Wasn’t that a cruel trick to have to listen to that….

But as I hung up the phone, it dawned on me that Dottie was right at that moment feeling as good as she was sounding on that machine. She was already in heaven, sitting at the feet of Jesus and cured of every pain and illness.

But I almost fell into the trap of poverty of attitude.  It made a good story, why shouldn’t I tell it?  I’m sure you know people who can keep the drama going on and on and on.  And before you know it, your whole attitude has sunk to that level – to say nothing of the poor people having to listen to you.   Some people hold onto complaining and being miserable like it’s a life raft.  And maybe for them it is.  But as Franciscans, we need to be willing to give up our attachment – our materialism – to let go of our need to complain and be miserable. And put on the attitude of Christ. If CNN were able to interview Jesus on the morning of Good Friday,  do you think he would be saying” Oy, what a night, I haven’t slept, but my friends did!  Great bunch of guys, they are. You wouldn’t believe what I’ve been through.”  Or do you think he said, ”I loved you the most today. It’s been a tough day, but I got through it. Thanks for asking.”

God makes His presence known to mankind through each of us.  We cannot extend His hand to anyone else unless we are holding onto it ourselves.  And if we are telling our story with both our hands waving in the air, we aren’t holding onto Him. In the famous prayer attributed to him. St. Francis asks…make me a channel of your peace.  Not give me peace.  Make me a channel – let me empty myself.  From  Ephesians, chapter 4 are these words that we need to hear:   Never let evil talk pass your lips;  say only the good things men need to hear, things that will really help them.  Get rid of all bitterness, all passion and anger, harsh words, slander and malice of every kind.  In place of these, be kind to one another, compassionate, and mutually forgiving, just as God has forgiven you in Christ.

And just what is evil talk.  We immediately think curse words would fall into that category and they do.  But Evil Talk isn’t a single entry topic.  What about gossip.? What about telling things that you promised you would hold confidentially?  Making fun of people, laughing along with the crowd when someone else is doing the insulting? What about the ‘adult topics’ you discuss when your children or grandchildren are within earshot?

God has given us two hands for a reason.  Keep one hand in His.  And keep the other one free to extend both His and your grace to someone in need. Keeping both hands occupied is a blessing.  After all, remember what your mother told you about idle hands???

May your Lenten journey continue to be filled with the graces that you need, opportunities for your growth, and the ability to take a step or two closer to Our Lord.

Photo by Nazim Coskun on Unsplash

Need for Pastoral Care of the Clergy

Herefordshire Monastery of Benedictine Sisters – used with permission

I know the word ‘pastoring’ doesn’t really exist, but I wish it did because it expresses something we are apt to forget. Those to whom we look for pastoral care are themselves in need of care and support. Throughout this pandemic we have heard a lot from parishioners who are sad or unhappy at the way in which some clergy have seemed unresponsive to their needs, especially during periods of lockdown or church closure. As one disgruntled man remarked, ‘They think they have done enough by becoming third-rate movie stars with their live-streamed Masses and what not.’ I daresay some have; but most haven’t. They have tried to be good and dutiful priests in a situation none of us has met before. A few have been blessed with the imagination and creativity to meet the new circumstances positively, but many more have struggled and one or two have been utterly crushed by the experience.

Some clergy have felt abandoned by their bishops and left to soldier on, not sure what to do for the best. They have been burdened with an extra load of admin at the very time when those they chiefly rely on to help — mainly more senior members of the parish, who may well be shielding because of age or infirmity — are not available. They live alone; some admit to being close to breaking-point, others cannot bring themselves to articulate their feelings of loneliness and discouragement. For them celebration of the Holy Mysteries is not the only aspect of priesthood that gives joy and purpose to their lives. They miss the interaction with people. More than one has confessed that, being naturally shy and without the ‘excuse’ that coffee after Mass or regular parish meetings of one kind or another provide, they are becoming more and more isolated.

Wrap and Throw Service

Happily, this is where the brotherhood of the priesthood takes on fresh meaning and importance. It has been heartening to learn of the support received from friendly ‘phone calls and video meetings with fellow priests; but it isn’t enough. Here at the monastery we do our best to listen non-judgementally and sympathetically to those who feel the need to unburden themselves of the distress they feel. I hope we manage to reassure them that they are not letting the side down or being a failure because they are not exercising their priesthood in ways familiar to them. We try to give encouragement. In the monastery we refer to this as our ‘Wrap and Throw Service’, meaning we do our best to wrap those who come to us in the love of God and throw them back into their parishes to minister to others. But again, it isn’t enough.

The Role of Parishioners

The people best placed to support the clergy through this time of pandemic are their parishioners. Yes, you! The bishop can only do so much; fellow priests and monasteries can only do so much; but you are there. You know your priest in a way no one else does. It does not take much time to send a friendly email asking how he is and saying you miss seeing him on a regular basis. A word of thanks and appreciation for what he is doing to meet the needs of the parish will never go amiss. An offer of help may be warmly received. Who can tell? Pastoring our pastors isn’t a difficult art. It simply requires a warm heart and the ability to see the human person wearing the collar — someone just as much in need of encouragement as we are ourselves.